Preparing a Child for a New Baby in the House


A challenging time for any family is when a new baby is being introduced into a house where there’s already a child.  This is especially true if this is the child’s first sibling.  The classic reason for this difficulty amounts to jealousy.  A first-born child doesn’t know how to handle the shift in attention, throughout the pregnancy and then for a long duration after the new baby is born.  It can be confusing for a child that has spent the first year or more of its life with total attention, and total control.

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Don’t be alarmed if the child acts out during this time.  The child will try to get attention because they’re unaccustomed to not getting it!  There’s a way to prepare your child so you can minimize their jealously, fear, and confusion.  Include your child in the discussions about the pregnancy, the planning for the new baby, and the care of the newborn once it’s arrived.  This will give your child a sense of being a part of the process.

If your child is too young to grasp the concept of pregnancy and a new baby coming into the world, then don’t explain more than you have to, and what their minds are able to grasp.  Tell the child that the baby will arrive in winter, around Christmas, or some landmark that helps them to understand the timeframe.

Instead of asking yourself how much you should or shouldn’t tell your child, focus on answering the questions that they do give you.  If your child asks the million dollar question about where babies come from, then assume they want to know where exactly the baby comes from, as opposed to sex.  There’s no need for an explanation of the birds and the bees at this early juncture.

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There are some fun ideas that will help you to inform your child about the new baby coming into the world.  Show your child baby pictures of them, so they will understand that they were once a baby, too, and that the new baby will look similar to what they looked like.  Read books to your child.  There are some fun children’s “childbirth” books that help to tell the story in pictures and such.  It’s also not a bad idea to take your child to visit friends who have babies, so they’ll know what to expect.

These days, you can even find sibling birthing classes, which are conducted in hospitals.  These fun little classes show the future-sibling how to hold the baby, discuss their feelings about the pregnancy, and learn about where babies come from.

When your child feels as though the birth is an intimate family event, involving dad and mom and them, they will feel more included in this process and excited about it.  Let them come to the hospital right after the baby is born to have their own personal time with the baby and mom.  This will help them to feel special again.

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